Affogato
by Minato's Moustache
Summary: After being sent out from his home on a quest to become a man worthy of the family name, Ash finds himself broke and in desperate need of a job. Whilst he's never tried being a barista before, he's pretty sure he can make it work. That is until a disgruntled customer sends his world into chaos. AU (Still non-human though! ;D)
1. Chapter 1

_See bottom of work for authors notes please! Long time no see everyone, I wonder if anyone I used to know is still around... THIS IS AN AU PLEASE BE WARNED! Its a weird mix between coffee shop, university and just good old fashion supernatural? Who knows. Ash is pretty wildly egotistical also, be warned.  
_

* * *

Ash wasn't really comfortable doing it this way.

He enjoyed the pounding bass and the push of people in clubs; the widening of eyes as he offered to buy the drinks. He enjoyed the thrill, the hunt, the brilliance that was being attractive enough and smooth enough to get any girl in a club to come home with him. There was something beautiful and seductive about willing prey.

So why was he assaulting a homeless man under a bridge at 3am? The answer was simple.

She had ruined the hunt for him.

* * *

It started two months previous when he'd opened the newspaper to see:

 **Vacancy: Barista wanted. 7.50/ph. Apply by phone or within.**

It was so mundane that it made him laugh.

The entire situation was ridiculously vermin-like and disgusting, but the fact of the matter was that he really needed a job. He'd been banished from his home to 'prove himself' and the Redfern elders clearly had no idea what a world outside of the 17th century was like, or they didn't care because Ash had fallen sorely on his butt and he was broke. So he was living in a tragic studio apartment with Quinn and praying every time he went outside that he was hit by a bus made entirely of wood just to end his punishment.

"You won't last the week," Quinn said later that night as he picked grime from under his nails, "get a real job. Wasn't that the whole point of this," he motioned, "banishment?"

"Because hunting people down and killing them pays really nicely," Ash replied, "you've sure got that right. I need money, man."

"We agree there," Quinn grinned, "because you sorta owe me rent."

So Ash went in for the job and, unsurprisingly got it. It was the best he could do lacking any formal vermin training and even he had to admit that the 'trainee barista' work shirt clung to him perfectly. His manager would later confide that customer rates shot through the roof after Ash joined the work force, but this Ash already knew. If he could be the pride of his colony, he could be the pride of a coffee shop chain.

And everything was going fine - the hours made him want to cry and he'd spilt an obscene amount of cream on himself in the first week but after that it had gotten a lot easier. He expected he would see his face in the 'employee of the month' frame before long and sometimes he'd sneak glances at himself in the front windows as he left. By two weeks he was adjusted and not regretting leaving the colony.

"Coffee. Black. Large." The woman in front of him said 15 days into his employment and on the first day of his life becoming a living hell, "please."

"You know, you could probably make that at home," Ash said softly as he worked the till, "I mean, not that I'm complaining. Always happy to see a pretty face."

She rolled her eyes and pulled her bag further up her shoulders, "Thanks, but no thanks. I'm in a rush so, put it in a take-away cup, thanks."

Ash narrowed his eyes slowly. What he didn't know was that she was usually quite agreeable and that, having slept in and missed 15 minutes of her first lecture, she was actually just cracking skulls in an attempt to make up for lost time. All he could see was an average looking woman holding up his queue with her average, vermin nature and her completely stupid order. Also her attitude.

"Name?" He asked.

"Mary Lynette, but don't bother-"

He was already scribbling on the side of her cup though, slamming it down on the counter hard enough to show he was angry but gently enough so as to not spill any. God forbid he have to remake her order. She took it with a bitter smile, he shot back a smug grin, and she was gone. It was as she walked back down the queue that she noticed he'd scrawled _M'lin,_ and she had to resist the urge to scream and kick shins.

Ash watched her storm off, practically able to feel her aura pulsing with rage. He took the next order with an exaggerated smile, content with the fact he'd ruined the day of such a self satisfied, smug little-

* * *

"Boy," Mary Lynette practically yelled as she slid into her seat in the common room, "it was awful, I can't believe the audacity-"

"Slow down, one word at a time," Her best friend Michele soothed, "what happened? And why were you late?"

Mary Lynette groaned, "Long story. Slept in, etcetera. But anyway, I go to buy coffee and there he is," she gestured widely with her arms, "this dude that clearly thought he owned the whole damn city serving me coffee."

"Wait, did you go to the place off fifth?" a girl she barely knew interjected, "because if you're talking about that blond man that looks like he stepped out of a goddamn fashion magazine I don't know what you're complaining about. He's lush."

"That's just my point. People like him think that because they're pretty they can glide by on life. I bet that's his first job, I bet he's never had to work in his life because he's so beautiful. It's unfair."

Michele curled her lip suspiciously, "you sure are referencing how stunning he is a lot."

"What? No he's- no." Mary Lynette sipped her long cold coffee, "He was awful. I hate him."

"This isn't like you, though," Michele said, "I think you have a crush."

"I think you need to leave." Mary Lynette joked, because she didn't get crushes on pretty boys. She had never gone out for the jock archetype. It just wasn't her style. She went out for the silent artsy type - for people who truly understood things. Not boys with enough hair spray to be a health and safety hazard.

So why had she enjoyed arguing with him so much?

Ash sunk his teeth into the dainty neck of a girl he'd picked up downtown. She was cute and willing enough, but with how short she was he had to be careful not to dangerously wound her. Not that he cared, but discretion was valued out in the human world and Ash didn't exactly want to leave a trail of bodies.

As he fed he found his thoughts drifting. He was sharply aware of the sweet coppery taste, of the feeling of damp brick behind him and the soft gasps and moans the girl was making but he could barely pay attention.

He found himself wondering what the girl he'd encountered earlier that day tasted like. What was her name, Mary Lynette? He chuckled mentally at the idea that he could forget her name when she'd been all he had thought about since that morning. It wasn't even that she was stunningly attractive or witty or anything, it was more that she had rolled her eyes at him. _At him._ So rare was it in the mundies for a human girl to roll her eyes at Ash's advances (in fact it was the first time) that he couldn't help but wonder what was wrong with her. Gay, maybe? He wondered as the girl beneath him went limp.

And then he found himself in an alleyway cradling an unconscious human and wondering where his life had all gone wrong.

* * *

 _AUTHORS NOTES:_

 _HELLO! Thank you for reading this. I wrote it for fun as a video game patched and as you can tell I'm pretty damn rusty. Mary Lynette is wildly OOC and Ash is... well... Ash, I guess. I appreciate you taking time to read so please review or fave! or whatever. I'll probably write more if I get any form of response from anyone I'm pretty bored._

 _Also seriously wtf is this fandom?! I've missed you guys! Strange Fate when?_

 _Have a nice day!_


	2. Chapter 2

_I don't have a beta._

 _I tried to write Ash for this chapter how I imagine he probably was before he met Mary Lynette in the books: smooth, suave, and incredibly bad at actually knowing anything about women. If him being a blatant misogynist and admitting to it in Daughters Of Darkness aint good enough for you people to believe this, then I don't know what is!_

* * *

She kept. coming. in.

Sure, business was business and Ash wasn't complaining… but he kinda was. Sometimes it was with friends, sometimes alone, but she'd always order politely and sit quietly. Since the first time, she'd been perfectly civil. Ash didn't get it.

But why bother trying to understand. In Ash's opinion women were fickle beasts, and vermin women were even worse. So what if she was surprisingly pretty? So what if her outright hatred of him was endearing, challenging even?

"Stop it," he muttered, earning a wide eyed look from a customer, "Wait, sorry, not you!"

The customer wandered away, leaving him with a full shot of Mary Lynette. He caught her eye, looked away. Her hair was tied up in an impeccably neat ponytail, he noted. She was beautiful.

Fuck, fuck this. Damn. God.

He looked at the clock. 30 minutes until closing time. It had somehow hit 8:30, and the sun was starting to cast long shadows on the square the cafe looked out onto. Ash could feel relief seeping into him at the sight of the darkness, even under the harsh glow of artificial light. He wasn't exactly new to the whole sunlight business, but life on the island had always been composed largely of waiting until dusk to go outside - hot summer months spent in the shade of trees and in humid classrooms. The nights were filled with the thrill of the hunt, of running through forests and acting like an adult but feeling like a child at town meetings. The outside world was so different. He blinked, swallowed.

Mary Lynette was right in front of him.

"Can I have a refill?" She asked, making him jump.

Ash flashed a signature grin and tried to look apologetic, "Sorry, but we're closing soon! I think Dickey's is opening in an hour if you want something stronger?"

She shifted the weight of her bad and smiled, "are you meant to recommend that your patrons take their business elsewhere?"

"Trust me - if we could sell alcohol, we would. I've been campaigning for months."

He looked every where but her eyes.

"I was in a really bad mood that day." She said abruptly, and Ash was left wondering why in the holy _hell_ she was making this more awkward than it had to be. He wasn't one for awkwardness - actually he wasn't really one for maintaining friendships long enough to make awkward mistakes. And yet here he was, with not a single soul in the shop besides himself and this human woman stood right in front of him, apologising for something he barely even cared about. Jesus christ please.

How to play this cool.

"It's fine," he said, leaning against the rack behind him, "I know how women are with these kinda things, y'know."

She narrowed her eyes, and he got the first glimpse of her anger since their initial encounter, "What do you mean?"

 _Tread lightly, Ash,_ he thought, _lightly._

"Well, I mean, I've dated a fair few women in my lifetime. You always get pissy around your time of the month, I don't blame you."

 _Nailed it._

She gave him a look of utter disgust and stormed out of the store, rattling the glass of the door with the force of her slamming it.

 _Double nailed it. Maybe she'll never come back._

Ash found himself locking up with a smug look on his face.

* * *

"Honestly, it's disgusting," Quinn said after sidling into the kitchen and pretending to be interested in what Ash was doing, "I can't believe it."

Ash was used to the routine - Quinn would stand around looking like he had something to say, make some vague comments about his hatred of things, and then launch right into-

"She tried to follow me home. Again."

Ash rolled his eyes and turned around, "really, who?"

"You know who," Quinn settled down into one of the kitchen chairs with a sigh and an overdramatic frown on his face, "the human. Hunter. I can't remember her name."

"The one that set you free?" Ash stirred his coffee. He loved living with Quinn - he loved that he could drink coffee and eat entire pizzas and watch the cold impassive look on Quinn's face that he was SURE meant jealousy. But he could never really tell with Quinn, the dude was like a fucking statue.

"Well, yeah. Is she even going to try and kill me? I lost her on the other side of town. I've given her about 200 chances to try it, so I don't really get it."

Ash shrugged, "dunno, wanna go hunting?"

Quinn folded his arms, curled in on himself. Ash was tempted to make about 500 jokes about how short Quinn was maybe write a book, but he held back. The man was obviously brooding over some human girl, and Ash knew any jokes about reporting him to the elders would have him out on the streets and (probably) dead.

"Sure," he said finally, "whatever."

And off they went.

They were unstoppable. A dynamic duo that charmed women and men alike with a perfect mix of mind control and being pretty. Those few rare souls that wouldn't be won over by Quinn's soulless eyes and Ash's boyish charm (self proclaimed) were easily won over by alcohol and, well, alcohol. Sometimes when Ash was walking arm in arm with a beautiful woman he became nervous that this was wrong in some way - meals on the island were always placid, doe eyed and consenting. These women were all going out to have fun with their friends and essentially being assaulted. Quinn liked to go after goths, too, which seemed kinda weird to Ash. Whatever though, he wasn't gonna judge.

His prey of the night looked up at him, eyes heavy and thoroughly seduced. For not the first time since moving out into the human world did he feel like a bad person.

"Wow, I didn't realise you had clothes that didn't say 'trainee' on them," someone yelled in his ear. He turned around, finding a girl he'd never seen before grinning at him.

"What's it to you?" The girl on his arm was beginning to get confused, and he realised he had to get out of there fast. Quinn was nowhere to be seen, the music was making his head hurt, he was hungry and tired. Bored.

"I'm Michele," she said, "my friend has like, the HUGEST crush on you!"

"I don't really care. I need to go."

He turned to leave, but Michele grabbed his arm. Well, I say grabbed it. Really he could've slipped out of her grasp like liquid, grabbed her by the shoulder and slammed her into the floor; maybe even drained her in front of all these people. But he wouldn't, he couldn't.

The girl was squirming now, pushing herself away from him.

"Sorry to be so rude," Michele said, "but you're a huge asshole. She comes in every day and then you have the audacity to be horrible to her just because your manager isn't there, or whatever. I ordinarily wouldn't say anything, but-"

Ash shook her loose, let go of the girl panicking next to him, and got out of there like a bat out of hell.

* * *

Quinn found him two days later in his room. The curtains were drawn and the room was silent, as it had been since that night.

"You look sick as hell," Quinn said, stepping into the room, "it smells bad in here. When did you last feed?"

"Um. Monday?" Ash burrowed further under his covers, "I called in sick at work."

"This isn't like you. You're going to suffocate. You're lucky I came back, you know. I'll go out and grab you something."

"Thanks." Ash poked his head out from the covers, his face a pallid circle in a swathe of patterns, "where you been?"

"You know, the usual. I'll tell you when I get back."

Quinn returned 20 minutes later with a dog, a fact Ash thought was maybe a joke until he saw the look on Quinn's face. Or lack of look, I guess. It was all in the eyes with Quinn.

He drank hesitantly at first, and then like a drowning man gasping for air. He didn't care where Quinn had gotten the mutt, or that it was actually close to drinking a werewolf (which was foul by the way), or about anything really.

"So where've you been?" He asked when he was done, earning a shrug from Quinn.

"Eh. This and that. Got kidnapped."

"Why aren't we both dead by now then?"

Quinn shoved the dog into a bin bag as he thought, "that girl. I guess."

"What, that hunter? She's out for you, man. Why don't you just turn her if you're so into her."

Quinn looked at him like he'd just shot his father, "how dare you insinuate I'd do anything like that."

Ash just shrugged, "whatever. I need to go make some phone calls."

As it turns out, Mary Lynette wasn't publically listed. It probably didn't help that Ash didn't know her last name - but he figured she probably lived alone. He really didn't know, and it was annoying him.

The two days of suicidal brooding had brought him to one conclusion - he had to nip this in the bud. He was losing his edge; this was the second time in a number of weeks that he'd been thrown off the hunt by her or something relating to her, and he was kind of hoping that if he apologised or something (maybe bought her a car) it'd make the problem go away, and he'd go back to normal.

He hoped. His chest hurt when he thought of her.

* * *

 _SORRY THAT NOTHING REALLY HAPPENS IN THIS CHAPTER! O: I'm just kinda writing? I have a lot to write. I don't want them to suddenly get together it seems kinda random to me. Also this Quinn/Rashel subplot is consuming me and i love it. I cant believe im writing this. my google docs page is full of half finished NW fanfiction. Go read my Divine Intervention update if ur interested, its about angels etc. Someone asked me to update Casanova, and it was awful, but maybe? i dont know. maybe ill just keep posting every day until you all like it. maybe i'll write strange fate personally._


	3. Chapter 3

_What's up party people?! I'm here. I've got a review tomorrow so I'm biting my nails and trying to study hard, but I took a break to think about Ash and how much I love him._

* * *

"This is dangerous, Ash." Quinn said softly, watching Ash watch Mary Lynette with cold eyes.

Ash spluttered in indignation, crossing his arms and trying to look casual.

"I don't know what you mean," he replied, "this is recon. Perfectly innocent - what if she's a hunter, or something?"

Quinn's smirk said it all. His gaze flickered briefly back to where Mary Lynette was sat. She was in the campus coffee shop, chocolate smeared on her face and textbooks spread out on the table. She looked about the opposite of dangerous.

"I should report you," he said eventually.

"And what?" Ash didn't miss a beat, "reveal your location to Hunter? I thought you were trying to break off from the family legacy, brother, not embrace it."

"At least I'm not in love with a human girl."

Ash ignored him, choosing to glare in the direction of the shop instead. They were huddled together in an alley, blending into the shadows. Well, Quinn was - Ash was wearing his work uniform, and it was an unfortunate shade of bright red.

Ash was, as he stressed earlier, definitely doing recon. it was part of his four step plan to Figure It Out, although he was still unclear on what he was figuring. Maybe the giddy feeling in his chest when he thought of Mary Lynette - something he was attributing to a weird case of Lamia arrhythmia. But to anyone questioning him, he would tell them that he was trying to figure out if she was a threat or not.

 _Yeah right,_ he thought to himself, _a threat to my feelings_. Quinn ignored him sniggering at his own joke, although he noted the slightly desperate sound of the laugh.

"Just go talk to her." Quinn said, "I have to go. I don't have all day to waste sitting around watching you pine over vermin."

"Funny joke," Ash sneered, "going to get beaten up by your own favourite snack? I swear, you're letting that hunter catch you just so that you can flirt and escape."

Ash hadn't known that it was possible for the dead to blush, but Quinn was sporting a wild case of tomato face when he pushed his way out of the narrow alley and stormed off down the street. Quinn was so obvious. He sat under layers of faux edgy detachment, just to go writing _John Quinn-Hunter_ (or whatever their last name was) a hundred times in his diary. Hilarious.

He'd be so caught up in his light amusement of Quinn's Smithsesque personality that he didn't notice Mary Lynette yelling at him until she tried to push him over.

"Stop following me, you creep," she screamed, drawing attention from onlookers, "I'm gonna call the police."

"I didn't realise it was illegal to be on a street," Ash shot back, "I didn't even realise you were here until you tried to assault me."

"You've been stood outside Nina's for, like, an hour." She said, her voice shaky, "and this is a creepy alleyway, not the street."

Ash found himself watching her as she continued to rant, only sorta processing what she was saying about _suspicion_ and _warrants_. Her hair was frizzing from the rain earlier, she looked tired, and disgust was obvious in her eyes. She looked like she thought Ash was scum, and it was actually attractive.

This wasn't a recent thing - the stalking. It had been about a month since his revelation that he had to Figure It Out, but this was the first time he'd had a conversation with Mary Lynette in that time and the reason she irked him so much was becoming more and more obvious.

"Are you even listening to me?" she spat, "you're such a pig."

Ash found her so beautiful because she hated him so much. She fought back. He could've easily manipulated her - made her want him. But that removed the thrill of the hunt.

And if Ash wasn't a Hunter, then he wasn't much.

"I'm sorry," he said abruptly, "I didn't mean to scare you."

He mentally scolded himself for sounding so pathetic, in his opinion, so needy, but the words wouldn't stop coming out.

"You're just. I know I've been an asshole but I wanted to make it up to you," he found himself saying as his mind screamed _abort! abort! you're not invested in this woman!,_ "I wanted to, you know. I dunno. I felt so mean for being-"

She cut him off to laugh in his face.

"Go out, with you? Ash, seriously, I'd rather die."

He actually felt kind of hurt for a second, before he was overcome with waves of self righteous indignation and anger.

"Whatever," he drawled, hoping that he sounded casual, "your loss."

Mary Lynette looked like she was revving up for more arguing, so he decided to stop her in her tracks by doing what he did best: disgust people.

"Why don't you point me in the direction of whichever of your friends has the supposed 'huge crush' on me, then?"

Her face went blank, the rage visibly leaving her body. It was replaced immediately by confusion. Ash heard her heartbeat speed up slightly, which was impressive considering how hard it'd been pounding only a moment earlier.

"What're you talking about?"

"Your friend, Michele," he was thoroughly in his comfort zone again, "I saw her in a bar a few weeks back. She told me that one of her friends had a thing for me. Is it the short one that comes in with you some times?"

"Poppy?" Mary Lynette spluttered, "what? No. I-. Fuck you, Ash."

She kicked him in the shin and left.

* * *

Mary Lynette felt lost. It was a feeling she'd experienced a lot since moving away for college, but it was usually quelled by calling her brother or driving the short trip back to her hometown to see him. Secondary solutions involved climbing up the rusting fire escape of her apartment building to the roof where she could watch the stars.

It was a clear night, but the city smog still disguised most of the stars. Mars was still visible, glowing hot and red and reminding Mary Lynette of the vast significance of the night sky. Her star readings for the year had Mars penned for Scorpio, but she usually scoffed at star signs. Something meant for gossip magazines and click bait on Facebook.

She felt strangely curious though, so she pulled her phone out and looked into it.

The significance of it made her smirk. Mars under Scorpio - forbidden love, determination.

Breaking taboos. Is that possible? She brooded quietly, her brain regularly returning to the cruel look in Ash's eye when he'd asked about Poppy. I mean, she hadn't forgotten that Michele had apparently blabbed about her (completely fictitious!) crush on Ash, but that was something she could deal with later.

Because the look in his eye. God, it was so unfair. She'd thought she was paranoid when she started seeing him everywhere, but a tiny part of her had been hopeful that he was going to approach her. He'd stopped serving her at the cafe a long time ago, something that hurt her although she'd never admit it.

And then she'd finally worked up the courage to march over to him and frankly ask him what he was doing, but it had ended up coming up a little more like ' _ash you're so creepy and awful i hate you please leave me alone forever!_ ' when she was aiming for ' _ash you're sorta cute lets skip this hating each other and get straight to the stargazing and romantic walks_ '.

Haha so, okay, maybe not quite like that. But still, the sentiment remains the same, and she was surprisingly hurt by his immediate dismissal of her after she'd rejected him.

Even if he had asked her out, technically, and she'd said no. It didn't matter, because he was the rudest person she'd ever met. Antares levels of awful.

Mary Lynette wished she could compare him to stars to his face. Maybe over a coffee. She blushed, feeling ashamed.

"I should've dated Jeremy," she muttered out loud, "I'd never be in this mess."

Jeremy had lived in her hometown, and up until she'd met Ash she had the biggest crush on him known to man. He'd been a little weird, but she was attracted to his standoffishness. She heard someone found him naked in the desert one night when they were seniors, though, and it had freaked her out a little too much to take him up on his offer of prom.

But she was starting to think that she could get behind some naked desert trekking.

* * *

 _I'm gonna leave this here because it's late but NEXT CHAPTER….._

 _Rashel! yes yes I know. Hold the applause, I'm excited too._

 _Writing this is honestly a gem. I don't mind if no one likes it very much, since it's just so fun to write them all be awkward about their feelings._

 _I also can't remember how Ash and Quinn are related. Seriously. the entire family tree is a HUGE MESS and I bet even L.J doesn't know._

 _#Thanks for reading so far though! Lets all hold each other and pray for LJ to recover swiftly and (maybe) pay me to ghost write strange fate._


End file.
